I have one motivation in life: that the Sovereign LORD God Almighty be glorified. This is a particularly easy motivation in one respect - His glorification is His work. He is glorified because He accomplishes it. Nothing I do (or don't do, for that matter) profits, improves or enhances Him. He is God, therefore He surrounds (robes) Himself in His glory ... & nothing I do diminishes His willingness or ability.
So like clay drawing its form from the tools, fingers & hands of the potter, I am aware He is shaping me into whatever form He pleases for whatever purpose(s) He chooses ... and this is enough. The awareness of His immediacy in the formation of who I am & why I am permits me to REST from all the anxiety of despair because I know what I am.
I know my imaginations ... no, you do NOT want to go there. I know my delusions - narcissistic megalomaniacs have nothing on ...... hmmm, proved that one, didn't I. I know my past actions, both the "rational" (with excuse) & the "irrational" (without excuse). I know the death & corruption which creeps steadily through my frame, reminding me of all the stupidity I thought was "a good idea" at the time.
Yes, I know what I am ... & when the evaluation is complete, the fact is I am but a lump of clay & each day is His exertion to form me into precisely what He requires, when He requires, why He requires. Romans 9:8-32 (especially vs.20-24)
The passage speaks of two types of vessels ... those of wrath & those of mercy. There is an evidence that you are one or the other, for what you cannot be is "both". Just like you would not store foodstuffs in a grungy garbage can (or garbage in a cookpot) ... for that would foul the foodstuffs, God does not pour mercy into vessels of wrath or wrath into vessels of mercy.
You might say "But life has been hard", & while that may be true ... it has not been hellish torment separated from the benevolence of God - which is the ultimate destiny of wrath.
You might say "But life has been blessed", & while that may be true ... it has not been eternally worshipping in the presence of the thrice Holy, which is the ultimate destiny of mercy.
So what is the evidence, if not the circumstances of this life? Galatians 5:16-6:10 would seem to answer that an evidence is the contention of the Spirit (with holy desires) against the flesh (with self-centered desires). 2 Corinthians 1:22 teaches the Spirit is given as a guarantee - so only those with the guarantee *of the promise of mercy* have the Spirit ... & no one who has the Spirit is held guilty & under judgment (Romans 8:1, 12-17).
This would indicate that ALL who do not have the Spirit (& therefore do not have the promise of mercy) are vessels of wrath ... except there was a time I didn't have the Spirit (Ephesians 2:1-3). All those who "end" as vessels of mercy began as "by nature, children of wrath" ... clay!
Then those glorious ... GLORIOUS ... words "But God ...". I am clay by nature & cannot do anything to change that. I began my days as a child of wrath & .... God changed WHAT I am, for His glory & by His grace.
He changed me & He can change you. Perhaps as you read this, something "called" you to desire He change you ... perhaps you think if you pray "sincerely" enough, He'll be obligated to change you. Park that idea now. If He has caused you to desire Him, He has already begun the work of transforming you, but He does it according to His will & not yours ... for His glory & not yours. Instead of trying to obligate God, seek to know Him ... read His revelation of Himself through Jesus His Christ, pray (as a peasant who is addressing his king) ... give Him thanks - start with the fact He created you & has given you breath. Begin resting in the understanding that you cannot fail to be what He has decreed you to be because HE IS GOD. Once you get past "Thank you, God, for making me ME", it is my prayer you would begin to thank Him because He has revealed Himself as God ... & what it means to be God. That He is God gives purpose to pain, strength for enduring, hunger for righteousness, source of holiness ....
It is late ... or rather early ... so here is a start on my Thanksgiving Day thoughts.
........... "you may be blessed because He was accursed"
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